Monday, November 29, 2010

Black Friday: BAT-SH*T CRAZINESS!!!

"The first Noel, the Angels did say Was certain poor shepherds in fields where they lay keeping their sheep....Blah, blah, blah GO CHRISTMAS!!

Stuff, we want stuff and there is no better way to show how awesome America is than Black Friday, 3am shopping craziness! Here are a few AWESOME faces from the soul-suffering day!

I should have never had children...



"I want to kill each and every one of you." "NEXT!"



Have you seen 127 hours? The movie was based on these women's experience on Black Friday.



"Gimme dat!"



"Is that YOU Toy-R-Us Jesus? Nope, just Satan. My bad."



"I guess Billy's mom CAN beat up my dad after all".



"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"



"IT'S HAPPENING, IT"S HAPPENING, IT'S REALLY HAPPENING!!!!"



"I'm just SO happy"



"Bring it, BITCH!"



"WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWEEEWEEEWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"



"Move it, G-MONEY COMING THROUGH!!"



"GRANDMA DOWN, REPEAT, GRANDMA DOWN!"


big ups to my homes at the huffingtonpost.com

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving: God Speed, My Friends, God Speed

May you all survive the weekend filled with family, family friends, and creepy uncles.





Holy Mind-Blowing NFL Chart, Batman!

Here is a little diagram of the 'Circle of Life' for the 2010 NFL season. Going clockwise, each team has defeated the team under it by the scores given.

MIND. BLOWING.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Globalization: Pop Culture Style

Where do you want to live? Take your pic based on how America views the rest of the world, or what movies / TV shows you enjoys.

Take a gander:

(click on the pics to enlarge....That's what she said)





Monday, November 22, 2010

Epic Fails in Business

As a real estate broker, I am technically a small business owner. I am thankful that with all the competition out there, there are still idiots like these people. Maybe it's time to think of a new career path, eh?



I just can't understand how FAG Bearings has not become a FORTUNE 500 company already.




How do these men get ANY work done? They are masters...




I hate you AND seafood!!!




What the hell does ANALTECH do? And WHY is their logo an upside down sperm?




No wonder this business owner has been single all his life.




We don't like cuddling.




They're high performance, and an entrance around the back.




Maybe you should have taken your wife's last name.




They have an entire Plaza for that?




Want Crabs? Find a Dirty Dicks near you.




Service with a smile. What?




Well, in all fairness, they WERE playing R. Kelly in the store.





Never give a PMS-ing woman a loaded gun. I smell a lawsuit coming.




Ew.




Is this something like "Two Girls, One Cup"? Cause if it is, I don't want it.




Well, you asked for it.




I guess all good STD's start at a Liquor store, so you might as well get to the point.




I don't think 'politically incorrect' even begins to describe this business sign.




Ahhh, we see what you did here.




I bet they are the most successful drug store in town.




There are so many questions, but I don't want the answers.




Just a dong.




Yes, I could say something about Dick's Sandblasting BUT I'm not. Juiced Up Training is the best place in town to look jacked without actually doing anything. Side effects: Acne, rage, small testicles.




NO.




Sick, nasty.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Richard Seymour: THANK YOU

While it may be a 'no-no', every woman (and man) in the world just got a little redemption. For those of you who don't remember/know/blocked out of your memory, Ben Roethlisberger is a grade A rapist-douche bag. He also is ugly as sin. So in todays game, Richard Seymour did what everyone in the world dreams of; punching Ben Roethlisberger's ugly mug. Basically, Seymour did what the U.S. legal system couldn't. Well done sir, well done.



p.s. Ben, please don't rape me.

Love,
Alex

Friday, November 19, 2010

Real Superheros Defend Seattle


This is pretty freaking amaze-balls. Following in line with the movie Kick-Ass, these "super heros" have taken to the streets to fight crime. Oh, and you better believe they have a name/call, Rain City Superhero Movement. The group says they are part of a larger, nationwide movement of super hero awesomeness. As any modern superhero should, they have a website where they describe what a true superhero is:
"A Real Life Superhero is whoever chooses to embody the values resented in super heroic comic books, not only by donning a mask/costume, but also performing good deeds for the communitarian place whom one inhabits."

Seattle Police Department is a little worried that these Kia driving (yes, they all drive around in a Kia while they do their superhero duties) will get hurt. SPD is investigating this whole awesomeness.

And to make things even more amazing, here are the superhero names:
Thorn, Buster Doe, Green Reaper, Gemini, No Name, Catastrophe, Thunder 88, Penelope, and Phoenix Jones, the Gaurdian of Seattle.

God speed, Rain City Superheros, God speed.

Oh, and please stay out of the Central District. I cant imagine that going too well for you.

Seattle Real Estate: Holy Awesome House, Batman

Live in Seattle? Want to be the coolest person in Seattle? Want to be like the guy in the Old Spice commercials? Then you definitely need to check this home out. This blows Tom Hanks little house boat from Sleepless in Seattle out of the water (no un intended...though, it kind of was).

2369 Fairview Ave East, Seattle WA 98102 - $3,800,000
This 3 story, floating penthouse features 850+ square foot of terrace and deck space to enjoy your AMAZING view of iconic Seattle. It includes 3 bedrooms, 3 and 1/2 bath, and 2,866 total square feet. Oh, and to make sure no one swims up, uninvited to your floating penthouse, this home is located in a new GATED floating community (crazy, huh?) And of course you are given a boat lift and parking space. Pretty freaking sweet.