Friday, December 10, 2010

Celeb Real Estate: LeBron 'I sold my soul to the Devil' James

Perhaps the most hated man in the NBA, LeBron James has just laid down some chump change (for him at least), for this South Beach home.

A little lesson for our younger readers; if you sell your soul to the devil, negate all of your morals and ignore the people and city that made you who you are, you too can have this home that God made on the 6th day.

When the rest of the country asks LeBron, "how can you sleep at night?", Lebron simply replies by showing pictures of his ri-DONK-ulous super-mall that he calls a house.

Stats: $9 million, three-story home overlooking Biscayne Bay in Coconut Grove, 6 bedrooms, eight 1/2 bathrooms, a wine cellar, library and home theater.

Front of Home - This looks like an apartment building a drug lord may own from Grand Theft Auto.

Master Bedroom - The room in which the Ghost of Christmas Past, Present and Future will visit James.

Kitchen - Where James eats baby seals mixed with the tears of orphans for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

"The Nook" - That's right, he has a room that is officially called a "NOOK". I want to punch Lebron and the architect in the face.

Bay view - what a crappy view...

Yacht Dock - Not a boat dock, a YACHT DOCK! Jerk.

Back of Home - Visualize MTV jams being taped here.

Top of the Stairs

Kitchen - with cabinets as dark as his soul.

More Kitchen - Maybe a 90 minute special dedicated to where he was going was worth it.

Bathroom - Papparazzi take note, no shades.
Laundry Room - To clean all of his dirty laundry, ZINGER!

More Bathroom

Infinite pool and bay view

Spa - naked LeBron

Theater - Where LBron watches himself

Wine Cellar - Where LeBron gets crunk.

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